Seven Lies The Dating Gurus Told You
Let me ask you a question: If you wanted to meet a fantastic woman, would you want to learn from someone who put pick up artists on a pedestal?
If you wanted to meet the kind of woman that you could trust with your life, if you wanted to meet a woman with total integrity, a woman who would never think of being with you as something trivial, would you want to learn from a guy who focused on how to "score" to get quantity of just any girls?
Would you trust your future with someone who one day is all about selling "getting ALL the girls" and the next day is about "getting quality"? Maybe the next day it will be about selling kitchen sinks and frisbees and toilet cleaners.
This road I have taken started when I was 17 years old, and all I wanted then was a great woman for something real. It took almost two decades to sift through all the total hogwash out there, especially from the guys who call themselves dating gurus and pick up artists.
Meeting a great woman has never been and never will be a joke to me.
And of the most massive lessons I learned was that I was being told absolute lies by the supposed dating gurus and pick up artists!
Yes, lies. Not just "half-truths" but absolute lies that will destroy your success with a woman if you are looking for something real.
It will destroy your future even if you only use that advice in the beginning, as an ice-breaker, because it sets things up on the wrong track, the wrong angle, and as every day goes by with that woman, you keep getting farther from her, till it's hopeless and lost forever.
So let me share with you seven lies the pick-up artists and dating gurus tell you.
Lie Number 1:
"If a woman sees you as relationship material, the you will be considered a "loser. Much better to be seen as the male who would never settle down, who is "hard to get", who is a slick and cocky "player" type- that is what triggers attraction."
And this my friends is a total lie. A lie that has destroyed the future that millions of men could have had with the women they have met so far.
The truth is that you will only be considered a "beta" male if you see yourself as a beta male.
If your self-concept is beta, then I assure you that you will be taken as a beta male even if you have a huge sign on your forehead that says"I will never settle down".
If you think that you are settling for someone, if you think that you are only in a relationship because you can't get better, if you think that you are marrying someone because you have to, etc etc, then you are a beta male.
But when you love someone and they love you back and you both want to take something to a HIGHER level, then if you don't do it because some moronic "dating guru" or "pick up artist" told you not to, and you listen to that advice, then and only then would you be a "beta" male.
Giving in to pressure from an external source is what makes one weak and beta. And that is what makes a woman feel repulsed from a man and feel zero attraction for him and not want to spend the night or even one minute with him, never mind her life.
The irony again is that it's the pick up artist advice that makes you weak and that is the kind of thing that attracts the very worst kind of women, who will like to take advantage of that weakness and see what they can take out of you.
And then we wonder why the pick up artists tell you to "watch out for gold-diggers!" And other lies and hateful things such as, "Watch out for all women - they are unfaithful!" Their advice creates weakness, which attracts the vulture type women rather than the virtuous ones. A great woman will simply leave you alone and not be interested, but a horrific woman will gravitate toward the weak men- and pick up artist advice actually makes you weak.
Lie Number 2:
"To attract and get respect from a woman, you have to make sure to learn various pick up artist tactics that show you are hard to get."
This is another lie. To get respect from a woman, you must first respect yourself.
Don't ever do anything that you feel is beneath your dignity, and you will get respect from a woman.
The irony is that the things the pick up artists tell you to do actually strip you of your dignity because they worship women simply for a woman's looks- the obsession with quantity rather than quality, the obsession with having to fake your identity with all kinds of absurd tactics actually lowers your self-esteem and confidence, and in many ways makes you ashamed of who you are, since you have to hide behind some artificial tactic rather than learning how to take pride in who you are.
Women want a man who has dignity and will not sell it for anything.
Lie Number 3:
"If you want to avoid getting into the "let's just be friends" zone, you better make sure to get her into bed really fast."
The reality is that this is nonsense.
A great woman is not needy to get into bed with anyone, no matter who you are.
And if she detects that you are trying to get her into bed quick, she will only feel less trust for you, and she will back off faster than you can blink.
Now, of course, if you are with a woman who sleeps around with tons of guys, it might be another issue.
I'm talking about a great girl, not the trash.
Oh by the way, I forgot to mention, the pick up artists never give you a serious talk about things like sexually transmitted diseases, or STD's.
No, of course not. The things they talk about having nothing to do with reality, it's just like watching a Disney movie or fable where everyone flies around on magic carpets- in the real world however, pick up artist advice does not fly, and it doesn't lead to you getting a great woman, in fact it repulses a quality woman away from any guy who uses those tactics.
In real life, you need to know about what really is important in this area called "meeting and attracting a woman".
The pick up artists are hoping you will be ignorant.
But think about it, why would you want to rush sleeping with a woman?
There are billions of women on this earth.
More than you could ever sleep with.
Chill out and get to know first if she is worth spending time with.
The irony again is that you can't lose this way, as even if you were the type of guy that didn't care about quality, you could always get to know a lot of women this way and not rush, and then have a hundred women at your fingertips if you so wanted. Also, those women would be more interested in you than if you rushed, because you truly were relaxed and not feeling needy to get them into bed-it makes them feel more relaxed and thus sexual with you as well.
Lie Number 4:
"Being good to a woman is for losers while all women fantasize about being with an arrogant and cocky player".
This lie really gets me, it's so massively untrue, and yet it's everywhere in the subtleties of the entire dating guru and pick up culture.
It's not being good to a woman that is not attractive, it's when you are being extra "nice" to a woman who has done nothing to earn that treatment from you.
Do you do good things for your friends? Do your friends to good things for you?
Of course you do, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's a good and cool thing.
Same thing with a woman- if she's good to you, then if you are not good to her, then you will be considered an insecure "loser" in her mind.
And guess what? This is how quality women really feel about players that are so scared to really be good to a woman and so scared to drop the "masks" they wear in the form of fake memorized lines, and manipulative techniques to attempt to negate her self-esteem.
A great woman will just ignore the attempt to put her down, or she will chew the guy up and spit him out for even trying to mess with her.
Lie Number 5:
"Don't talk about her problems at all, and don't talk about anything emotional with a woman or she will see you as being weak and not masculine."
The truth is that if you never talk to her about her things, stuff that she is going through, and if you never speak about emotional stuff ever, you will dumped fast and rightly so for not caring about her.
The truth is that the problem only starts if a woman is always talking about her problems to you and is not balancing that with also having fun with you and is not willing and happy to listen to your issues too.
The key is balance, and as a man, you should not be a cry-baby but you definitely are not considered weak for having emotions and for expressing them- this kind of bullshit lie that is expressed by "pick up" and dating gurus probably gives more men heart attacks from stress than anything else. If you can't confide at all in the woman you are with, what the heck is the point of being with her?
And if a woman feels she can't ever confide in you about emotional stuff, she will simply get that connection from someone else.
And again, this is why these "experts" are always talking about cheating and unfaithful women--they surround themselves with drunken party girls and they put Playboy and Hugh Hefner on a pedestal, and then they wonder why they are getting less than cream of the crop qualities in the women they meet!
The truth is that the stuff that these guys "teach" you will push away the best kind of women and will attract the very worst type of woman.
Lie Number 6:
"You can only measure your real skill with women by picking up women in a dance club or lounge."
This is yet another lie. The reality is that meeting a woman in a club is easier. Women in clubs tend to be slightly tipsy, and are ready to be approached.
The real test of "skill" is approaching a great woman with high standards who is not drunk and who is not looking to just play around, who is looking for something meaningful, and connect with such a woman on a deep level, and then to keep this up so that three weeks later she is just as into you and three months later as well, etc.
So take it from me, you can enjoy clubs if you want to, and if you want practice talking to women, you'll find a lot of women in clubs, but if you are looking to meet a great woman where you will have to also form a great connection, clubs are not the place to do it.
Lie Number 7:
"Only talk about pop culture and nothing else deep or serious with a woman."
Another massive lie. The truth is, if you are looking to attract a superficial woman who is only interested in her nails and her own ego, then yes, absolutely--make sure to not get into anything deep.
However, if you want a great woman, then it's crucial to connect on a greater level!
She is in fact going to be looking to see if you can do this. The key is to layer in the playful vibes as well, so that a woman can see that you have a range of emotions that you can engage in with her, and not just be about one channel!
To achieve the mastery level with being able to meet, attract, and keep a great woman, I am reminded of something Yoda told Luke Skywalker: "Unlearn, young one, unlearn".
You see, the greatest masters have realized that the real key is not to learn hypnosis or to learn memorized pick up lines, or to learn manipulative tactics against women, but rather it is to unlearn. To get de-hypnotized as opposed to hypnotized.
Underneath all the layers and layers of bad programming you have received from all kinds of external sources, including the horrific advice from the supposed "experts" you have something perfectly powerful, something magnificently charismatic, something unstoppable that will attract a great woman with ease. There will be no effort required once you learn this.
Michael Marks is a former pick-up artist and who has learned the hard way over two decades just how harmful pick up artist advice is for getting a great girl. Now he teaches men what they really need to know if they want to meet a great woman for a fantastic relationship. To find out more, go to: http://www.getagreatgirl.com
